Feeling negligible 

August 28, 2016 § Leave a comment

Today marks my last breakfast read with this book as I finally reached the end. I was intending to finish within a week of coming to Tassie but the world got the better of me. Like what the observer said:

Gave me that rare, greedy feeling of: this is so good I want to read it all at once but I mustn’t if not it will be over too soon.

Though I was a slow (dead slow) reader, I’m kinda thankful for that because then I wouldn’t be rushing through the book or feeling like I need to slow down. Ha!

Every chapter or page I read on every permitting morning, it was like reading a flashback of my weeks doings, because the amount of relevance of Christopher’s story to mine more than just coincidence. I could relate to his thoughts and actions more than I could for anything else, and I really wondered how and why I chose to bring this book with me from home and to read it now in a different place at a different time, it spoke differently.

What saddens me is the reality of the norm, as the world wouldn’t stop for people like us who just needs a little bit more time. But I guess that’s how it is. In this time of passing faces and fast paces, I dwell in the comfort of Christopher’s logical mind to find himself in the midst of going about solving Wellington’s mystery death and finding mom in London. I loved reading about how Christopher was subconsciously trying to love the beings around him through his subtle relentings despite having a hard time to comprehend the illogical complexity of love as a whole.

Thanks Chris, you’ll be a great scientist that I want to meet in future if I get to.




Good just gets better

August 27, 2016 § Leave a comment



Its 01 42 am, with a wanning cresent looking down on me as I’m safely tucked away under my sheets. I’ve been away from home, away from land, set a sail on a maiden sea voyage on the Bluefin vessel 1981 across the Bass Strait 39.3153° S, 145.8468° E for a week. I kept trying to find time to pen down my thoughts during the journey but couldn’t and didn’t, despite the enticing seascapes from dusk to dawn, triggering my inner emotions and worldly thoughts.

This voyage was nothing short of full blown uncertainties, revealing the unknowns, embracing the surprises, and accepting the awakenings. I’m still recuperating from the infamous ride across the 350km rolling channel, and thanking the heavens for saving the ‘highlight’ of the trip only to the last day. All I know was that I couldn’t be perpendicular, I had to be one with the swell, lying down was the best way to go. I was strapped down on the galley bench by the unforgiving viking rocking motion for a good 5 hours, before perfectly timing myself to stand up and peek out of the circular vessel window and witness the reality of nature.

I had mixed feelings about fishing this trip mainly because of the ethics involved and what not, but I’ve come to a conclusion that this is more than just animal ethics, more than just another science, more than just another part of nature we exploit, more than just the livelihood of many, more than just things with fins.  Whatever that lies beneath that medium is what brings life to the ocean, and for whatever reason we are extracting it from the ocean, some weighing more than others, it should be the very same reason we’re ensuring it still reigns in the ocean. Therefore putting this concept in perspective, I wish to fully exploit this experience and make something out of it. I don’t know what its gonna be but I’m counting on it. There’s no point seeing and not believing and acting.

The true highlights of the trip such as the fishing and food and the picturesque views would have been told repeatedly by mouth and we’re not really allowed to post pictures of the activities hence none of that is needed here. What I need here is clearance from the buzz, leaving the remnants of clarity and solidarity, if there’s even any left. I can be a mix of an introvert and extrovert, but I’m known by close ones as the latter. Its only natural to be quiet in the beginning due to all the unfamiliarity, but the ship crew and rest of the company were pretty much each to their own, with all sorts of personalities from everywhere (in Australia), and I soon found no further reason to hold back as well.

A truly inspiring body was my partner throughout the trip, named Ririk. She’s a mother to a precious 4 year old and currently taking her Masters in her late 30s. Unfortunately her time on Bluefin wasn’t as swell as most of ours (this swell pun is getting to me), as she already felt seasick on day 01, but she charged through it like a boss. She’s also another reason that inspired me to make something out of this trip, for her and for myself. There was a laminated note pasted in the galley, of a letter from the office and chief inspector of Fisheries and Game, proclaiming under the Fisheries Act of how its illegal for female to assist in any of the fishing activities and banned from obtaining a fishing licence as netting is a man’s occupation. This note was dated to 1933 and I’m glad the Fisheries Board has come to their senses because we are all part of this as a human race, regardless of gender. Okay this is just me being a little feminist but I would like to add this lest as a reminder.

Right after coming home to Kerslake, I was well on my way with a half tank to Maria Island 42.6451° S, 148.0650° E, yet truly another blessing because it was a very popular trip that got fully booked within hours of opening registration. After being away from land for a week, Maria Island was the perfect place to have grass rolling under my feet, though it probably was more wombat poop. Had a bit of time to visit painted cliffs thanks to the low tide. I’d never thought I’ll be seeing such immense geo formations up close, let alone feeling the grains of litho formed and shaped by the riptides.

There’s just been so much good going on, and the cynics within me are already plotting my downfall to come, hence I want to stay alert and weary, for I don’t wish to be blinded by the sun and not see the waves engulfing me in the midst of all these wonders. Thank You for the good, the better, and the forthcoming of whatever.



Monday like no other

August 15, 2016 § Leave a comment

After what felt like an eternity, I finally submitted my first 1500 case study on a commercial fishery at 7 30pm, slightly past the 5pm deadline.

I would expect to fall into my well deserved deep sleep immediately after completing my assignment, but I took a slightly different approach. I went down to try to make dinner just purely to satisfy my biological hunger, and in turn I was greeted with something called mango strudel with a good dollop of cookies & ice cream. Life is truly rewarding.

It’s been one and 1/2 months here in the winter down South, with the days stretching a little longer but time still flashes before my very eyes. With each waking moment I’m soon to bid goodbye to the day I’d never got to spend. I thought life here was supposed to be slow paced. And it is. So it must be me. I must still be caught up with something of a pace that does not align. It’s also been psychologically challenging to stay sane and refrain my cynical self from drowning my mental capacity to appreciate the little and enjoy the simple.

I took the walk I’d yearned for

braving the wind chills and blinding sights

I was greeted with the weary night sky

Cumulus puffyness in motion

Gliding in my deep blue notions

Like the sea the sky so vast

Like my heart it wasn’t made to last

What would be tonight will soon become day

My thoughts and actions will fade away

The only thing meant to stay

was the peaceful presence that you play



Where Am I?

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